About BullyWatch

Julie Oakley is the founder of BullyWatch and a mother of three. In May 2001 her 15 year old daughter tried to take her own life because of bullying at school. At the time she found a distinct lack of support for the parents and victims of bullying. As she was unable to find help, BullyWatch was formed to give help and support to those who suffer distress and anguish because of bullying.

My Journey - By Julie Oakley

Five years ago my eldest daughter attempted suicide as a result of persistent verbal bullying in school. I was devastated and consumed with guilt as I hadn’t recognised the symptoms and assumed it was just adolescent mood swings. As a parent it made me feel a total failure. I always thought we could talk about anything, and as someone who was was also bullied, would know the signs. How wrong could I have got it?

I knew I couldn’t let her down again, so I approached the school and the local authority and did not seem to get anywhere. I was told the usual, we have an anti-bullying policy and everything is in place. What did that mean? I wanted action, I wanted the perpetrators brought to justice. I wanted them out of the school.

My daughter spent five months out of school having treatment, while those who caused her problem were getting on with their education. How can that be justice? How could I get the school to listen to the parent who worked in an office? Who really didn’t know the rules of the school or the protocol?

I decided to find out if other parents had problems with bullying and how were they able to deal with it. The local newspaper highlighted my story. The response was massive, I received many phone calls and letters. The stories were heart breaking and everyone needed some sort of support. So Bullywatch was formed to give help and support.

I then had to spent hours searching the internet, attending conferences and training to gather information. I was then approached by Lucy Thomson a Graphic Designer, who offered to set up a website. I established a link with a group of professionals who wanted to set up an anti-bullying partnership. Through this process I began to realise what a complex issue bullying was. It wasn’t a straightforward subject that could be addressed without looking deeply into why young people would behave in this way and how could they be helped to recognise and change their behaviour. This meant I had to rethink my values and opinions on how bullying should be dealt with.

With my increased knowledge I volunteered at a local senior and primary school to provide individual and group work to support victims of bullying. I also decided that I should work with the perpetrators, who I now know have their own issues and that exclusion doesn’t solve them. Often children are modelling the behaviour of adults and you can be challenging the culture and values within their families and communities. I am now employed by the school and a fervent campaigner on anti-bullying issues.

I wanted to transform what was a really terrible experience for my family into something positive that could prevent other children and their families experiencing the same thing.

Bullywatch would not be able to do the work it does without the kindness and continued support of Lucy Thomson and Adrian Middleton, whose work on this website is much appreciated.

Julie is an extremely pro-active member of the community and in 2005 she won the "Parish of Doddington Community Worker of the Year" award for her anti-bullying work. She has also appeared on many television and radio programmes including:

• BBC News 24
• BBC Radio Bristol
• BBC Points West
• ITV News
• Five Live Radio
• Channel 4 News
• The documentary Britain's Secret Shame: Bullying.

BullyWatch has also featured in articles in the local and national newspapers, including:

• Bristol Evening Post
• Gazette
• Bristol Observer
• The Observer
• Bath Chronicle

Julie also attends many conferences and helps run workshops on bullying, including running a workshop on friendship clubs for young people at the 2006 South Gloucestershire Anti-Bullying Conference. She has been a voluntary member of the South Gloucestershire Anti-bullying partnership for 4 years and an agency partner for the South West Anti-bullying Alliance for a year.

Please visit this page again to find out more about BullyWatch
and what we are doing.