Who can I speak to?

There are many people you can go to when seeking
help about bullying.

You may be a child wondering who the best person to speak to is, or a parent wondering who you can go to when bullying becomes an issue, or someone who is experiencing bullying in the workplace and are not sure who to turn to.

Young People

Parent or Carer: As a child the best person you can speak to is your mum, dad or carer. Parents can sense when there is something wrong with their children. Sometimes it feels easier to hide what is happening from them, as you may feel ashamed about what is happening to you and may not want to burden your parents with your problems. However a parent or carer will be able to listen to you and it will feel better to share that problem with them. You can then go and speak to your school or college together and begin addressing the problem, instead of having to do it on your own, you will have someone that will stand by you.

A Teacher: If you are being bullied at school then you could speak to a teacher, head of year or head teacher, whoever you feel most comfortable talking to. You can talk through your problems with your teacher, and they should be able to help you come up with a way of stopping the bullying, they may also be able to speak to the bullies and get them to stop. Your school may also have a scheme where you can speak to older children, or 6th formers, and they can help you to resolve the bullying. Sometimes it is easier to talk to people of your own age as these people have probably been through the same experiences themselves. If your school has one of these schemes then your teacher can refer you to this.

Connexions personal advisor: If you are aged 13-19, you could also speak to a connexions personal advisor, they will be able to advise you about how you can deal with bullying. Connexions personal advisors can give you information, advice and practical help with all sorts of things, like choosing subjects at school and mapping out your future career options. They can help with anything that may be affecting you at school, college, work or in your personal life. They work in schools, colleges and community venues to ensure they are accessible to you. Connexions can be found locally throughout England, they can be contacted on 0800 923 0323. You could ask your school if they know where the nearest office is, or visit the website.

BullyWatch: If you feel that you can't speak to anyone in your family or at school then you can always talk to us at BullyWatch or speak to anyone at the other organisations that deal with bullying such as Childline. We are here to listen to you and can help you to deal with the bullying and give you advice on how to try and resolve the problems that you are experiencing.

Parents

The School: When your child tells you they are being bullied the best thing you can do is speak to someone at the school to try and resolve the problem. Firstly make an appointment to speak to a member of staff, such as your child's tutor or head of year, don't lose your temper, shout or swear. Try and make a list of the points that you want to raise and return to it until they have been answered satisfactorily. Ask for a follow up appointment to discuss the action that the school has taken and if it has worked. If your child is still being bullied we then recommend that you speak to the Head teacher. If you are still not getting anywhere with the school staff, make a written complaint to the Board of Governors. The governing body is legally bound to hear the complaint. They will meet and discuss a course of action to be taken. If your child is still experiencing problems then you can make a written complaint to the Director of Education. If none of these actions work then you may want to consider sending your child to another school, some schools cannot effectively deal with persistent bullying. Please contact BullyWatch if you need any further help and advice.

Friendship Group: If there is a Friendship Group in your local area it may be a good idea to encourage your child to join, a place where they can make new friends and this may help them deal with the bullying. If you don't have one of these groups in your local area you may want to set one up, please click here for more information.

Police: The police usually leave the schools to sort out bullying in-house. However if the bullying is physical they will be able to get involved and you may be able to prosecute. Your local community police would be able to help you if this was the route that you wanted to go down.

Bullying on transport: Many parents tell us that children are being bullied on the way to school and on the way home. You can talk to your school transport department to see if they can provide someone to oversee the behaviour on the bus. Another option would be to ask the school if they would write to the parents of the children using the transport, advising what is acceptable behaviour and that if they don't behave they will have to find alternative means of transport to and from the school.

Doctor: If you feel that your child's health is suffering because of the bullying, please talk to your school nurse or family doctor. They would be able to advise on professional help that is available.

School Health Nurses: Each school has a named School Health Nurse who can be contacted via the school. They have an active role in supporting children and young people helping them to develop their physical, social, educational and emotional well being. There are several different ways the nurse can support these children and young people:

By acting as a liaison between themselves and the schools;
By supporting the child/young person, helping them to
develop skills to manage the bullying;
By acting as a source of information for voluntary agencies and web sites.

Bullying in the workplace

Manager or Human Resources: If you are experiencing a problem with bullying in the workplace, the best person you can speak to is your supervisor or manager. Tell them about the problems you are having and who the perpetrators are. They will then be able to raise the issue with the people who are bullying you. You could also speak to your human resources/personnnel department, as you may be being bullied by your manager or supervisor. They will then be able to help try and resolve your problems. It is vital that we are happy in the workplace as it is where we spend the majority of our time. Please do not suffer bullying in the workplace, seek help from someone in charge. If you don't get help from anyone at your place of work then you can always speak to your union, they will also be able to give you advice. If you feel you need further help and advice do not hesitate to contact BullyWatch or visit one of the links to other websites that we have provided, for further information.